"It's Not My Job"

Serving is a part of life for those who make Stone Ridge Church their home. “Don’t stay where you are,” “Raise the bar,” and “Others need you” are three of our five values. “Serve one another selflessly” is the third step of our discipleship process.  We frequently put out the call for help and fully expect that everyone in our church will find a way to serve. “Attend One, Serve One” is our call to Stone Ridgers on Easter weekend, when we ask everyone to commit to two services, one to invite friends and the other to help out in some way.  Yes, serving is a way of life for us...

…so what I’m about to tell you will set some of you free.  You see, one of the perils of a servant culture is that some people take on loads they were never meant to carry. Nowhere is this more true than in the area of reaching out to our friends who are far from God.

I was reflecting recently about the Easter a few years ago when I invited our neighbors to attend a service. I prayed and looked for an opportunity to connect to them. The door finally opened a few days before Easter. I saw my neighbor outside, went over for a short conversation and popped the question: “Would you guys be able to attend Stone Ridge on Easter…we’d love to have you!” I was crestfallen when he replied, “We already have other plans.”

All of us feel the weight of eternity on our shoulders when we step outside our comfort zone and initiate a faith conversation with someone we care about. The stakes are high and one of our greatest fears is that we will put ourselves out there, only to be turned down. The temptation is to never take the risk, but what if we don’t? What if we just play it comfortable and pretend that the spiritual condition of those we care about doesn’t really matter all that much?


"I thought you said you were going to set us free, Sam! This feels just like the heavy weight I have already been carrying around.” Hang on, friend. The freedom part starts NOW. I want you to look at something Jesus said…"For no one can come to me unless the Father who sent me draws them to me.” (John 6:44 New Living Translation) Did you get that?  This was JESUS talking!  He said that he didn’t walk around with that weight on his shoulders. His job wasn’t to argue, nor to convince.  His job was to be available and to reach out in love to those around him.

It’s Easter season. WE ARE RESPONSIBLE TO REACH OUT IN LOVE. WE AREN’T RESPONSIBLE FOR THE OTHER PERSON’S RESPONSE! It’s not our job to change their heart.

I discovered this principle the very next year after my neighbor had turned me down. If anything, I felt even more intimidated by the challenge of inviting them…I already had one rejection to discourage me. So, here’s what happened: a week or two before Easter, I pulled into our driveway, noticing our neighbor out in his front yard. I waved at him, then pulled into the garage. As I got out of my car, a bit fearful of another rejection, I stepped into the sunlight to see him walking my way. “When are your Easter services this year?” he asked. “We want to come!"

It took a couple more years after that, but one Sunday at Stone Ridge, my neighbor and his wife gave their hearts to Jesus. All along, I had prayed for them. When God had fully prepared their hearts, they gladly received Jesus.  It’s not my job to change those hearts…it is my job to pray and invite, making the most of every opportunity to declare and demonstrate the love of Jesus!

If you are reading this and don’t really know where you stand in your relationship with God, I want to encourage you. If someone has reached out to You, inviting you to an Easter service, but you have turned them down in the past, why not call them or text them? Or go next door and tell them that you want to attend with them this year. It’s very likely that the God who made you has been gently preparing your heart for you to meet…and develop a relationship with…Jesus!

Our Bible friend Andrew, who has been the subject of our Stone Ridge “Take Me To Your Leader” series, has one more experience for our reflection. This week, we’ll see how he handles it when someone comes to him, WANTING to meet Jesus. It will be fun…and a great preparation for Easter! Can’t make it to Stone Ridge this weekend? Catch the podcast!

Building Bridges Toward Your Rich Uncle

If you have followed Jesus for a while, you probably noticed the raw wisdom in His words: “I tell you the truth, it is very hard for a rich person to enter the Kingdom of Heaven.” (Matthew 19:23 New Living Translation) It’s one thing to attempt a serious conversation about God’s love and what He can do for a person who is homeless or hungry or hurting; it’s quite another to pursue a similar discussion with someone who happens to be resource-rich.  You may not have a rich uncle or aunt or cousin or sibling or neighbor, but someone in your circle is far from God and has plenty of distractions to cloud his or her condition. Engaging them with why they need Jesus and how much His love could mean to them can be exponentially challenging.

 

While I will talk about this to our Stone Ridge Church family this weekend, here are a few thoughts on the subject:

1. Even Jesus acknowledged the challenge of reaching those who have much.
2. People with resources are often targets of those who would try to benefit from their influence, their fame and/or their wealth. Consequently, they are naturally skeptical. 
3. This who have much leverage their wealth to create walls that insulate them from connection to the outside world. Their private lives are frequently quite different from the people they are in public.
4. Jesus’ promise in Luke 4:18-19, “The Spirit of the Lord is upon me, for he has anointed me to bring Good News to the poor. He has sent me to proclaim that captives will be released, that the blind will see, that the oppressed will be set free, and that the time of the Lord ’s favor has come.” (New Living Translation), can be great news.  However, His promise will be ignored until someone realizes that he/she is poor, captive, blind, oppressed and needs God’s favor.  We must pray for them to recognize their need.
5. Many of the resource-rich find it hard to trust others. We who follow Christ must be willing to spend the time necessary to build a good name before them. Proverbs is a great place to start with practical ways for us to do this.
6. The Bible is full of examples in which God transformed those who came from wealth or influence, suddenly realized their deep needs and were changed by God’s power. 2 Kings 5 gives the story of Naaman, the commander of a great army who developed leprosy. Even in his condition, he wasn’t ready to humble himself. Someone loved him enough to confront his pride; as a result, God not only healed him, but transformed his heart.  

 

You and I are surrounded by people like Naaman. They have great needs that get lost in the shadow of their ample resources. As we open our eyes and our hearts, we will be amazed at how many of them encounter the powerful love of God and receive the gift of new life through Christ.

 

If you have resource-rich friends, many of them are still open to an invitation to Easter at your church.  This may be the one weekend a year when they are open, so we much make the most of those opportunities.  “Take Me To Your Leader” is our topic at Stone Ridge Church as we journey toward Easter weekend. This week we will unpack even more about how to reach those with resources. Hope you can join us!  If not, catch the podcast.

All In The Family

It was a conversation I wish I hadn’t heard, but sometimes the words you wish you hadn’t heard make an indelible mark on your soul. They teach you something you needed to learn. This instance was a conversation between two family members. One, a man who follows Jesus, was passionately trying to “convert” the other, who just as passionately resisted. The scene was a family crisis and everyone was reeling from the pain.

“Have you ever truly given your heart to the Lord?” queried the Jesus-follower. He was pushing…hard…and I knew it was from a genuine concern for the other man’s eternity.

“I’m not here to talk about this,” replied the second man with a note of anger in his voice. “I came here to support my family!”

The air was thick with the conflict between these two men, both of whom I loved deeply. In reality, I had just as much concern about the heart of the second man as my kinsman who was trying to share the Gospel with him. Was my own failure to say something to a man I loved a lack of faithfulness? Was my Christian family member driven by guilt as much as by Gospel passion? I’m not sure I have an easy answer to those questions.

This whole event, which took place almost four decades ago, sprang to memory as I thought about our upcoming sermon series, “Take Me To Your Leader.”  Most of you have heard of one of Jesus’ apostles named Andrew. Some of you remember that he was the brother of Simon Peter. What you probably don’t know is that Andrew fills a unique role in the narrative of the Gospels: every time we meet him, he is taking someone to meet Jesus. Somehow, Andrew had a winsome way of connecting people to Christ, including his own family.  That’s huge for me, because I find that family are some of the hardest people for me to talk to about the life Jesus offers.

Easter arrives in March this year. The season of remembering the death and resurrection of Jesus remains one of the best opportunities you and I have to naturally invite those we love to come and hear about Jesus. All during February, we have been focusing on how to pray and “Take A Minute” out of our lives to show Christ’s love to someone in our path. Easter offers a natural way to take it a step further and invite people to church with us.

“Take Me To Your Leader” begins this weekend with some simple ways you and I can build bridges with our family during this holy season. I hope you can join us for a worship gathering at Stone Ridge Church. Can’t make it? Catch the podcast!

Not Enough

A few years ago, medical problems landed me in an unfamiliar place. The specialist I had chosen happens to be in one of the nicer neighborhoods in all of Arizona. The location of his practice meant that Cathy and I would spend many days and nights in that area of Phoenix, sometimes in a hotel and other times in a rented condo.

It was during the frequent travel to that upscale community that I remember thinking, “It would be hard to live here and be satisfied with what you have.” The streets were crowded with very new, very expensive cars. Imagine a place where a simple Cadillac can look like a lower end vehicle. In such an environment, envy lives on steroids.

The reason for my whole line of thinking was simple: I spent many years of my life never being satisfied with the car I drove. Every time we got a car, part of the reason was because our previous car just wasn’t good enough for me. I would give Cathy the list of reasons that it made sense for us to dump the old model and get another one. Sometimes she would put up with me. Other times she would make it clear that she considered my idea a bad choice.

To be honest, much of my envy was secretly tucked away in my heart. I had far more dreams of newer, bigger and/or better than I dared speak to my wife about. I’m telling you now because I know that many people struggle with the same thing.  Consequently, I want to introduce you to a word: CONTENTMENT. Is it possible to learn contentment in a world that constantly screams, “Get more…you need it…you want it…you won’t be happy without it?"

This weekend at Stone Ridge Church, we will talk about Contentment as the final piece of the puzzle, helping us to “Reach the Broken Relentlessly.” Simply, it’s hard for us to have the necessary focus to reach out to hurting people when we are constantly trying to fill the emptiness we feel with things which promise fulfillment, but never really deliver. I’m pretty excited to share this with you because I will offer you a step-by-step way off the “never enough" treadmill. I hope you can join us live at Stone Ridge Church…it promises to be a great weekend. Can’t make it? Catch the podcast!

Take A Minute

Last week, I told you about a way we are encouraging our Stone Ridge Church family to personally reach the broken. Take A Minute happens when we pray daily, asking God to give us open eyes, open ears and an open heart to see the hurts that are right in front of us.  When we notice them, we are to simply do whatever the Holy Spirit prompts us to do.

I am working a shorter schedule this week so I can play with my grandkids. Therefore, I want to share with you a Take A Minute story that happened with one of my friends recently. I shared it last weekend at Stone Ridge, but it was a holiday and many were gone. I think you will enjoy it!

“I took a minute the other day when I was getting fuel for my truck. I pulled in behind a young couple who were getting out of their car. I inserted my card, started the fuel, then noticed the couple standing there face to face. She had a dollar in one hand and was taking change from the guy’s hand.

“At this gas station, you can get any size coke for 95 cents. I left the nozzle in my tank to fill it up and went inside to get a Diet Coke. When I went to pay with my drink in one hand and a dollar in the other, the young lady I had seen outside was saying to the cashier: ‘Pump four, $2.63 please.’ She then walked away.

“I sat my Coke on the counter, put the dollar back in my pocket and took out a $20 bill. Handing the twenty to the cashier, I said, ‘This is for my Coke; put the rest on pump four. And, by the way, if by chance they ask, tell them it’s from heaven and they should pass it on.’

“I walked to my truck just as the pump clicked off. I looked over and saw the young man put the nozzle in his tank and start pumping gas. The young lady standing beside him was holding his arm and looking for the pump to shut off at $2.63. I was washing the bugs off my windshield and noticed the girl frantically signaling the young man to STOP! They talked for a moment and she went in the station. Soon she came running out waving her hands, hugged the young man and said something to him. He started pumping again.

“With anticipation on their faces, they kept watching as the pump numbers whizzed by. When it stopped, the young man put the nozzle back and they stood there, hugging and rocking back and forth with tears in their eyes. 

“I had tears in my eyes, too, as I finished washing the bugs from my windshield. They never noticed I was there, but that didn’t matter. I got to thank God for His goodness and the reminder that all I have belongs to Him. I’m just the manager."

All kinds of people I know are having Take A Minute stories. These events release untold joy to those who experience them and I hope you get to hear more of them. Better yet, Take A Minute and experience your own!

According to Jesus, it costs something to be Take A Minute people. Those who weigh the cost and pay the price are the happiest people on earth. That’s our topic this weekend at Stone Ridge Church and I can’t wait to talk with you about it. Can’t be there? Catch the podcast!

They Don't Care How Much You Know...

Three generations of our family were represented in a recent conversation around my aunt’s dining room table. Somehow, we got to the topic of how my dad handled it when a customer couldn’t pay for the car repairs dad had done for them. I shared a story my father told me about a man who had the reputation of owing people all over town…and not paying his bills.  “You can take your car when you pay for the work,” dad explained as the man tried to convince him to take “payments.”  Credit cards were largely unused back then; accepted payment was by check or cash.

I shared dad’s story to describe the wisdom of a businessman who genuinely cared for people, but had a keen discernment about whether cutting them some slack was truly helping them or just enabling their bad choices.  My brother was at the table with us as we talked about this. I love Jimmie’s perspective on these matters for several reasons. First, he seems to approach life a lot like our dad. Second, he is eight years my junior and enjoyed a completely different experience growing up in our home than I did (dad’s work shifted from a car dealership to a shop at home, plus he had seen how quickly I grew up and intentionally carved out more time to spend with my brother). Third, Jimmie worked in dad’s business for several years, experiencing things I only heard about.

“I can tell you another story about a customer who couldn’t pay,” Jimmie said. "Dad let him take his car and told me, ‘He will be good for it.’ In the end, dad was right."

You KNOW the saying: “They don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care.” Is it possible that our dad was caring for people in both the above situations? Was he caring for the first man by forcing him to take responsibility, then caring for the second one by extending him credit? Without doubt, I would say, “Yes!”

Last weekend at our church, I introduced a simple little concept called “Take A Minute.” In our fast-paced world, followers of Jesus are often just as rushed and just as stressed as everyone else. Jesus didn’t cut us any slack because of our busyness, though. He told stories like that of “The Good Samaritan,” emphasizing that being too busy to help the hurting means we are just too busy! “Take A Minute” means that I am praying daily for God to open my eyes, my ears and my heart to notice the hurting people who are already in my path. I’m asking God to prompt me at least once a week to a need right in front of me, then I will “Take A Minute” to do whatever He shows me to do. It might be as simple as listening to the hurts in a person’s life. It might be challenging like helping change a tire on the side of the road or offering to pray for someone. The ways we can reach out to touch the brokenness around us are as far-reaching as the creativity of God.

I had just finished unveiling “Take A Minute” in one of our services last weekend, when a family in need waited to speak with me. In itself, this isn’t very unusual, but I was instantly touched by the deep economic struggle of this family and the seeming desire to get their lives moving in a new direction. Hearing their plight, I explained that we have a pastor who has direct access to the resources to help them and I left to find him. A few minutes later, that pastor and I were walking back to the place where the family was waiting. One of our young men stopped us and said, “My wife and I want to help that family. We are willing to take care of them for a few days.”

I am cautious telling you stories like this one, because we are all so influenced by a culture in which problems are revealed in the first few minutes of a story, then the whole thing is resolved in an hour or two. Real life is rarely like that, but I have frequently seen people, even families, radically changed because someone took a minute. Maybe it was a stream of someones taking a minute and I just got to see the one who helped them get past their obstacle, but in the end, lives were transformed by the goodness of God. There’s power in taking a minute, whether we get to see the full redemptive work of God or not. We must trust that our part is significant, even if it seems minuscule at the time.

I love to tell stories because they help us understand things we might have missed. On this Valentine’s weekend at Stone Ridge Church, I will share three “Take A Minute” stories directly from the pages of Scripture. Each one is a great example of caring for the brokenness in people. I hope you can come, because I believe you will be encouraged to care even more than you do now. By the way, these same accounts from the Bible are what helped my dad learn what genuine care looks like. Bring your sweetheart with you!

Can’t make it this weekend? Catch the podcast!

Another Way

I’m convinced that most of us are controlled, at least in part, by fear. We fear what we can’t control. We fear that others are in control. We fear losing what we have. We fear for our safety. We fear for our children. We fear the brokenness we see in others. 

 

I know this was true of me a number of years ago when I spent some time talking with an acquaintance named Jim. Jim had a terminal illness and my heart went out to him. I expressed my desire to talk and pray with him and we both ended up pleasantly surprised. Jim had some things going on in his life that I feared. It turns out that he feared what I, a conservative pastor, might say to him. Our conversations ended up with us both wanting to really listen to each other and respect the other’s background and viewpoint. There were no heated words, nor well-formulated arguments trying to win the other one over. Instead, we simply listened…and learned…and genuinely cared for one another.

 

Back then, during that season of getting to know Jim, we didn’t use words like “broken” to describe people. Our church’s vision statement, “Stone Ridge is a church of broken people for broken people,” has elicited lots of conversation on this subject. Some have more than a mild distaste for the fact that we call attention to this issue, but it resonates with many, once they take time to think deeply on the meaning of it. 

 

Most of us would quickly say that our world is very broken. Just this morning, I got up to the news that a militant Islamic movement in Africa — Boko Haram — was responsible for the deaths of 86 people in Nigeria. Many of them were children who were burned to death. Closer to home, about ⅔ of Americans say that our nation is heading in the wrong direction. We know that something is broken in the Middle East. We can tell that the world-wide economy appears to be broken. We are all aware of the statistics about broken marriages and broken families. It’s pretty easy to see that the U.S. immigration system is broken. BUT, even though we will acknowledge brokenness in every place and every segment of the world, many of us don’t want to identify ourselves as broken. Our pride rails against such a description. 

 

Perhaps, then, it’s better that we talk about HOW we are broken. Most of us can easily see facets of brokenness in our own lives. None of us would say that we have reached perfection in character, attitudes, thoughts or the way we maintain relationships. Most of us will admit to at least one bad habit that hasn’t been tamed yet. My bad habit is gossip, so please tell me yours! (That’s a joke.)  

 

Therefore, SINCE we are broken, we can open our hearts to the God who loves broken, lost people and sent His perfect son to die for us. As He forgives and begins to heal our brokenness, we can find ways to step into the broken lives all around us. The world has no need of proud (even arrogant) Christians who sit around and criticize everyone else. The world needs followers of Jesus who love genuinely and serve endlessly. When is the last time that you stopped to really listen to someone who is desperate for a listening ear or to touch someone who hasn’t been touched with genuine love and respect for a long time?

 

The religious leaders of Jesus’ day were like rivers at flood stage, drowning everyone who got in their way. Jesus came along and gently offered people a drink of living water. It’s time that we learn to love like Jesus, listen like Jesus and touch like Jesus. “Reach the Broken Relentlessly” is part of life for everyone who participates in the life of Stone Ridge Church. We are taking the words of Jesus, the actions of the early church and the practical realities of 21st Century life, to give you a simple way to become involved. I can’t wait to talk about it this weekend. Can’t make it to a service? Catch the podcast!